I have a tale to tell.
Not a fairy tale, because those usually involve cute talking animals. No. This is a cautionary report about being
smarter than the furniture you are repurposing.
The last few weeks have been very active in the Posh
household. I added a “posh corner” to
our current booth, and I’ve actually sold a few things. My friend, we will call
her “Paula” because that’s her name.
Paula says it classed up the joint.
I don’t know about classing anything up, but I can tell you that I may
have moved up to Master Level in putting a lot of stuff in a small space. It’s like real-life Tetris.
I’ve opened an Etsy store and managed to place items on it
for sale without sobbing, throwing the laptop or hiring my teenager to do it
for me. I have yet to see any sales, but
I’m working on being patient. So someone
go buy something, like NOW. (I said I
was working on it).
I’ve been to flea markets, yard sales, I ordered business
cards and even bought a storage unit at an auction. However, none of those experiences prepared
me for last week.
It’s rather humid in Poshfield these days, so on one of the
cooler evenings last week, I decided to do a little Posh work in the garage. This involved spray paint. Lots and lots of
spray paint. Now. Before you get all “omg you vented the
garage, right”, I’m not stupid. Ok, not
lick the frozen flag pole stupid - I did open both garage doors, had two fans
going, and had my little blue mask, gloves and eye gear on.
However (and here’s where the cautionary part comes in), I
underestimated the evil, malicious, sneaky, soul consuming fumes that are spray
paint. In retrospect, the London-like,
pea soupy fog should have been a warning sign.
And when daughter number two came out and said “MOTHER!!!!” should have triggered a flag. But the big reveal was when I removed the mask to find red paint specks in its lining…. the
inside lining….I should have known it wasn’t gonna be good.
After an entire night of coughing and wheezing, I awoke to
the worst, skull-splitting, eye-ball popping, oh- I- think- I- see –THE- light –
and- I’m – cool – with - that headaches ever.
I was miserable.
I did recover, and will live to spray paint again. But I
learned a valuable lesson. Paint fumes
cannot be trusted. Neither can the little
blue masks from Wal-Mart. And fog is never
good. I mean…. Have you ever seen a movie where something GOOD comes out of the
fog?
So the lesson here is to never over-estimate your protective
gear. I myself have purchased a new stuff. So if you drop by my house, and I’m painting,
you may see this…. I’ve put it in pictorial timeline for your viewing pleasure. I’m nice that way.
Then, a darkness fell:
Nothing good comes from fog. EVER!
Artist rendering of me, after a few paint fumed hours:
But, fear not.... lesson learned:
Fin
So there you have it folks. Learn from my mistakes. Or at least be smart enough not to put them on your blog.
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